Bad Touch
by Camy-Tay
Summary: Another song fic. This was the first oneshot I ever wrote for InuYasha. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Kagome was bored. Everyone was out of the shrine for the day, and whenever she called a friend they had plans already. She sighed and made popcorn in a giant bowl before she turned on the Discovery Channel.

Just as they got to a documentary on dogs, InuYasha decided to pop in, unannounced. And when he saw the program, he just sat next to Kagome and took a handful of popcorn, making Kagome jump.

'Man, the dogs were really going at it!' he thought to himself. "Welcome to the wild," InuYasha muttered, watching as the dog mated with the other.

"Um…InuYasha? This is a home-video. Someone taped their dog doing this," Kagome told him, looking very embarrassed. Is this how dog-demons acted too?

Next they showed dogs in the wild, and after that scene compared the two as they replayed and paused.

By the end of the show, Kagome and InuYasha both were blushing. Quickly deciding watching another documentary like it was out of the question, Kagome flipped the channel.

On MTV Japan, they were showing Koda Kumi's music video for "Selfish."

Kagome squealed while Inuyasha watched.

Why was the girl dressed like a dominatrix? That was the term Kagome used when he asked her what BDSM meant as he watched an American band air on her "MTV" once. They didn't have many Americans, but plenty of Koreans.

Speaking of which, next to come on was the Korean band, the TRAX. Kagome got up and started to dance and sing to the song. In the beginning was a giant scream and at first InuYasha was worried if the girl was okay. But she was.

"Kagome? Why did Typhoon scream?" InuYasha asked, listening to Jay Kim sang. "Is he okay?"

"He's fine," Kagome laughed, wondering how he could tell Jay Kim, Typhoon, had been screaming. She saw the music video a hundred times before, and only after several many times did she finally realize it was her favorite in the band. "It's just part of the song."

As "Liez" ended, EXILE came on, followed by Gackt singing "Secret Garden." As Kagome started to dance, she looked over to InuYasha and frowned. "C'mon. Dance with me."

Looking at Kagome liked she lost her mind, he shrugged. "How?"

She rolled her eyes and walked over to him, taking his hand and putting it around her waist. "However the music makes you think to dance." Slowly, she started to move back and forth on her feet, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Right now, this is slow-dancing."

Next on was "Still Alone" by Hamasaki Ayumi, in which InuYasha felt more bold. It was so sad! He even felt bold enough to rub against her slightly.

"That, InuYasha, is called grinding," she told him, a little embarrassed. Did he just grind her? Oh kami-sama he did!

"I like grinding," he confessed. He had never been that close to Kagome. He liked it, being pressed so intimately against her. He feelings alone sent a shiver up his spine. He wondered, what would happen if he did it again?

"Well, grinding is a more…" How did she put this to words? Sexually-charged dance? Those words were not a good idea to use with InuYasha! What if he didn't know what they meant? It be mortifying to have to explain that! "Couple-dancing thing. Even if they're only a couple for the night. It's for promiscuous people."

There! That had gone well.

No it hadn't. When Amuro Namie's song, "Four Seasons" came on next, he started to grind her. What was he doing? "InuYasha?" she asked, shocked at him.

"It's for couples, right?" he asked, turning her so he could grind into her back.

Man, for someone who didn't know how to dance he knew how to grind pretty well. But this wasn't a grinding-type of song!

Suddenly Kentaro Lloyd was on, the song over, and the grinding, regrettably for InuYasha, ended. KENNY was the VJ that normally played the English songs, considering he was half-British. But, RURI and Arisa Urahama also played an English song or two while on. Just not as many.

"What's up people? I'm Ken Lloyd and this is MTV Japan. We're going to hook you up to a song I like, a collaboration between an American band and an Italian band that hit me in the face. I'd like you first, to give a welcome to our Special Guest, BoA," Kentaro announced.

Kagome squealed and jumped back onto the sofa.

InuYasha froze in his seat next to her. Do what the music makes him think? Well it didn't matter what the music made him think anymore.

Ever since he had started grinded with Kagome, all he could think of was making her his mate. Instantly his mind went back to the show about the mating dogs. Souta told him once that he thought it was the perfect porn for dogs. And he was part dog. It's not like he couldn't use it as a how-to guide.

Insert Hard A into Hole B. Even Souta explained it that way. And his brother had once explained to him what "mating" was and entitled him to. He wasn't too dumb. And now he had his porn.

He laughed. What was porn, anyways? Souta wouldn't tell him.

"Kagome?" InuYasha started, sitting next to her. "What's porn?"

The miko jumped. How was she going to explain that? "It's…uh…" She sighed. Might as well tell him now and get it over with. "Taped sex. You know…mating? Porn comes in more ways of…sex."

Whoa! Kagome used the s-word! She was so innocent she couldn't even bring herself to say the s-word instead of gender! He went back to watching Kentaro James Shibuya Lloyd talk to the Korean girl. He heard her sing before, even knew some of her songs. Kagome especially liked her song "Every Heart."

"So, what was it like to become the voice of a opossum in the Korean and Japanese versions of the American movie Over the Hedge?" he asked.

"It was my first time actually doing anything more than music in the movie-world, so it was exciting. But it was definitely different, and I felt funny having to think of myself as such a small creature," she replied, smiling and nodding her head.

Kagome was in awe. BoA was the best! "Every Heart" was one of the best songs ever!

"And the type of music you did. Can you tell us your favorite movie to have done the music on?"

"The movie, InuYasha, was probably my favorite. 'Every Heart,' 'minna no kimochi' was a great song that I think got across to a lot of people. Everybody's Feeling's was one of my favorite songs to sing."

"Now, what's this rumor about you and an American star?"

"Well, I've always wanted to sing with Justin Timberlake, but I think if he heard that, he'd just be, like, 'BoA? Who's that?' But I'd love to sing with him," she replied, the same response Kagome heard when she was watching MTV Korea once.

InuYasha was shocked there was a movie by his name. He'd have to watch it with the Higurashi kids someday. Well…Kagome wasn't a kid anymore, but oh well.

"All right, we'll be back with more BoA, so don't go away," Kentaro told everyone through the camera. "Would you like to introduce the song?"

BoA nodded, looking into the camera. "This is 'Bad Touch,' or 'Discovery Channel,' by Bloodhound Gang and Eiffel 65."

InuYasha smiled at Kagome as he stood, extending his hand. "Care to dance?"

She smiled and took it, only to be turned and grind on a hard object. "What are you--"

"You said however the music makes me feel like dancing? Well, what if it makes me feel like mating and, I…? And I feel like mating with you?" he asked, unsure.

Kagome gasped, turning and staring at him.

"Ha-Ha! Well now we call this the act of mating

But there are several other very important differences

Between human beings and animals that you should know about

"I'd appreciate your input," the song started.

"But you mate for life," she reminded him.

"And there's no one I'd rather spend my life with," he retorted, smiling more confidently. "Not even with Kikyou. I love you Kagome."

She started to crash her lips into his, making her moan. Taking the chance, InuYasha stuck his tongue into her mouth and explored.

"Sweat baby, sweat baby, sex is a Texas drought  
Me and you do the kind of stuff that only Prince would sing about  
So put you hands down my pants and I'll bet you'll feel nuts  
Yes I'm Siskel yes I'm Ebert and you're getting two thumbs up  
You've had enough of two hand touch you want it rough you're out of bounds  
I want you smothered want you covered like my Waffle House hash browns  
Come quicker than FedEx never reach an apex just like Coca Cola stock you are  
inclined To make me rise an hour early just like Daylight Savings Time."

Kagome did stick her hands down his pants, eliciting a moan from the dog-demon. And indeed, she did find nuts. InuYasha pushed her down to the floor and quickly covered her with his body, his hard-on starting to rise faster than he thought.

"Do it now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Do it again now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Get horny now."

Oh, they were horny all right. The noises alone could attest to that. And he could very well do it like the Discovery Channel had been doing it.

"Love the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket  
Like the lost catacombs of Egypt only God knows where we stuck it  
Hieroglyphics? Let me be Pacific, I wanna be down in your South Seas  
But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft  
Advisory? So if I capzise on your thighs high tide B-5 you sunk my battleship  
Please turn me on I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip So show me yours,  
I'll show you mine "tool time" you'll Lovett just like Lyle  
And then we do it doggy-style so we can both watch X-files?"

He didn't know what X-files, but InuYasha planned on doing it doggy-style. Hell, he was planning to do it a lot in several many places, sticking Hard A into Hole B, C, and wherever else it would fit.

"Do it now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Do it again now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Get horny now…"

But before they could so much as get Kagome's red tie off, they heard people coming to the door and broke apart, gasping for air before jumping far away across the room. Then the door opened and they sat their innocently on the couch, listening to the end of the song as they tried not to blush.

"Ah, InuYasha. Good to see you," Mrs. Higurashi said, smiling as she went into the kitchen to put away the groceries. "I came back just in time too. I just bought some ramen for Kagome to take back with her."

"Really?" Despite being mad at Mrs. Higurashi, he perked up at the thought of ramen.

"Yep. Are you and Kagome going back now? Souta would love to see you. You could stay for awhile if you want." Then she looked to the TV. "Kagome, are you watching that KENNY and MTV Japan again? I swear, he picks some of the oddest English bands to introduce."

Suddenly Souta rushed in. "InuYasha! I thought I saw you earlier! Like, maybe an hour ago! Jii-chan had me help him outside ever since I got back from Shinji's house, Okaasan," Souta whined. "That was like two hours ago!"

"You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Do it again now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Do it now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Do it again now  
you and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals  
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel  
Get horny now."

Yeah, he was horny, but what was one night? Besides, it wasn't like he couldn't mate her in her room that night. After all, she did say she got her room sound-proofed after their last fight, right?

"I remember you telling me you got home squirt," Kagome complained. "You've been out there working, voluntarily, with Jii-chan for little over seventy minutes. I made sure to check. I'll stay the night. Can we, InuYasha?" she asked, looking him in the eye, the lust and love coming back to fill them.

"Of course. But can we watch that movie? InuYasha? The one BoA was talking about."

Souta grumbled about how he had promised days ago, not volunteered until he heard InuYasha. "Which one? We have all four! It's a really good anime series,too!"

InuYasha sighed. Oh, how lucky he was.

Really. Kagome had a great family.

And a mate was as good as married, which they'd also do, the Shinto way, when they thought of it. And to be married or even mated into such a great family, that was blessing enough from Midoriko-sama. When she gave them a wish, he knew he'd have no wish to change who he was.

He looked over at Kagome and smiled. She smiled back. They'd have a wonderful life together.


	2. Attention Fans

Hello,

This is not the writer you know as Camy-Tay. This is her brother, Jae, and I regret to inform you that she will no longer be able to write stories for you. November 18 of 2009, we received word that Cam had cancer. We caught it during her check-up after having the tapeworm removed, but we had not caught it in time.

April 17, 2010, Cam passed away from leukemia.

It has taken me almost a year to figure out her password to tell everyone what has happened. I am sorry for all of you that expected updates. I don't know why she ever made her password the mascot of the first boarding school she attended, but whatever. I loved her, but she was weird.

That being said, I know nothing about , except that Cam wrote on this website and she would want her followers to know she passed. I think they receive updates on her every entry, but I will try to post this letter at the end of every story she's written.

I will keep her page up and try to have her friends write stories in her memory so that she may live on, but I haven't talked to many of them since her funeral.

I'm sorry and God bless Cam. May she be in good hands.


End file.
